Wednesday 2 February 2011

Let's Try Defying Gravity

Yesterday's post didn't happen, and if I am absolutely honest, today's almost didn't either! Despite it being my birthday today, I am not in a good place at all. I know that we all have different names or descriptions for how our depression feels, and mine is called my black hole. I call it a black hole as I feel exactly like I am being pulled towards the darkness, and the closer I get to the black hole,and the more vulnerable I feel, the more gravity tries to suck me in with all its might, and the more futile my efforts at resistance become. My depression feels like there is nothing on earth I could do to fight it, just as you can't fight gravity. I feel like I am sucked into oblivion and god knows how I ever get out again...

Enter today's quote 'Let's try defying gravity'. The quote is taken from the musical Wicked which tells the story pre Wizard of Oz from the wicked witch's point of view. The musical, and the particular song I am referring to, Defying Gravity, actually have nothing to do with depression. Other than my love of musicals, and the general feel good aspect of this one especially, the words of the song do provide a purpose today. The song is all about being at rock bottom, and having no where to turn, and no other choice, but to try defying gravity, i.e. doing the seemingly impossible. And this, my dear readers, is exactly what I need to do. I need to be able to defy gravity in order to stop myself getting sucked in by my black hole. I understand that the concept is an incredibly difficult one, but it is absolutely not impossible.

So whenever I feel low, I am going to try playing this song on repeat and I really urge you to do the same. Somehow things don't seem so hard with a bit of feel good musicality in the background! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FlMBcTGJ4YM
Let's hope it gives me the strength to fight, because fighting my depression really does feel like I am trying to fight gravity: it is relentless, never ending, and exhausting. If i rest but for a moment gravity will suck me down into the black hole again.


xxxxx
P.S Another good song I always find helps me is 'I'm on my way', by the proclaimers, purely for the single lyric 'I'm on my way, from misery to happiness oh yeah', which seems to be permanently a fitting description of my life!

No comments:

Post a Comment